These Little Lights

I am fat . I am beautiful.  While looking for Chalkboard paint ideas I came across the second image below and it sent me into tears. I feel unattractive and overweight most of the time. There are other factors involved in my feelings of worth surrounding my body, but still; an image like this should not make me sob. At least I realized that and reminded myself that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I may not believe it 100% of the time, but it doesn't make it any less true.

It's been a night of midnight, one a.m., three a.m., and six a.m. feedings.  It's been a night of back rubs and the dispelling of nightmares and bottles. It's a morning of coffee and exhaustion, of lunch packing and last minute calendar checks before ferrying a child off to school. Then the cell phone was left behind, the debit card wasn't put back in the wallet, the second cup of coffee has spilled all over the vehicle and the ten year old wants to know why it's important for him to give the other kids a chance to play the games they want to play. Breakfast for twins turns into baby food smeared over faces and hair and on the floor and the baby is now crying. It's then it hits me. I just have to sit in the puddle. I've stumbled upon it, be it from sleep deprivation or overextending myself, or just flat out tripping. However it happened I stumbled into that big icky puddle and my feet got wet, and then my pants and it splashed up my clothes and I had a choic...